The game

Hi! I don't want anyone to freak out, but for all intents and purposes I'm off the grid. These are the expressions I use too often that I've had to define for Malawians over the last 5 weeks: freak out, that's crazy, this is ridiculous. 

I use them a lot. 

So back, though, to the matter at hand. My parents and I are deep in Majete National Park, a recent inductee into the Big5. This means that the potential to see five of the greatest bush animals exists here. In other news, watch my command of the English language collapse as I proceed to fail with speed and brilliancy in describing the wildlife. Some things are hard to describe; and there's more than one species of monkey, deer, and bird, by the way. 

The lodge we are staying at is one with the outdoors. One wall of our personal villa is completely open to the outside, as in no walls. It's hard to imagine but the villa is situated in such a way that the river (the Shire river) appears to greet that wide open non-wall. There's a large patio you can sit on. Or you can sit in bed. Regardless, the sounds of the flowing water, laughing hippos, and calling birds surround; it's just all there right in front of you. 

We're basically the only visitors at the lodge, give or take a few. The only other person here when we arrived was a man who has been all around the world and back and is currently riding his motorcycle across Africa and in the process producing a documentary. My parents and I looked pretty legit with our dIgicams as he loaded the jeep yesterday with his camera drone. Seriously. Twice while out, on our first ever safari drive, the jeep was stopped and the drone was released into the sky: 100... 200... 300 meters up and away. It captured us crossing a river in the jeep, and also captured a spectacular sunset. 

So far, the typical daily schedule has been as follows: wake up, light breakfast, safari, large breakfast, rest, large lunch, tea and coffee, safari, dinner. Repeat. I try to run from one place to the other to keep my figure. In addition, during each safari ride, coffee or cocktails (depending on time of day) are packed and served in the wilderness. We have a wonderful guide, Liwonde, who is pretty gung-ho about us seeing all the Park has to offer. Every so often he kills the engine and points enthusiastically at paw prints (spoors, snootily) in the sand. 

See that, he whispers, wide eyed, The lion was here. Yesterday. 

Malawi isn't necessarily known for their safari but when you have zilch to compare it to (minus a childhood stint at Bronx Zoo camp) and when you're as easily amused as me and my parents, this doesn't really matter. I'm particularly fond of the warthogs, of course, who remind me of prancing ottomans. This morning we also saw zebras and if I hadn't already pledged allegiance to the pig the stripes would have my one and only heart. We've seen hippos and baboons and elephants and impala as well. It's been a good time. 

Alright. Am I bragging? I don't mean to. I just feel like at this point you've been with me through thick and thin, through spiders and power outages, so it wouldn't be fair to ditch you for this. 

Have a good day,

Rebecca

PS: I'm serious: except for select spots our phones are registering No Service, and the lodge regrettably/probably for the better has no wifi. Someone check in on my brother.